Most Recent Posts

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So It’s Time to Divorce
Marriage is hard, but you never thought it would be this hard. One day the lightbulb goes off. “Now I […]

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Overcoming the Fear of Doom
“Part of me is always waiting for disaster to strike. Some terrible loss will change my life, and it only […]

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Premarital Sex Increases Likelihood of Divorce, But Why?
Because research shows children of divorce have sex earlier and with more partners, when I read, “Having between one and […]

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What’s in a Name?
For people with divorced parents, everything! There’s a lot of talk about 4-letter words, but in the parental-divorce world, two […]

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Revolutionary Way to Help Your Kids Survive the Divorce Process
The first week of January is annually the highest divorce filing and inquiry week of the year. 20% of those […]

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Putting the Thanks-giving into Thanksgiving (for Your Sanity)
“Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy” James […]

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Getting the Backstory…and healing Part 3: The Pillars of Healing
My father was an adult child of divorce. His father had divorced parents, as did his grandfather. I was well […]

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Getting the Backstory…and Healing Part 2: Talking with Our Parents
In Part 1, I reviewed how empathetic listening can help improve conversations and our healing. This type of listening encourages […]

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Getting the Backstory…and Healing: Part 1 – Empathetic Listening.
Adults with divorced parents can have lots of unanswered questions. I’ve found ACD are often reluctant to ask them due […]

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Five Ways to Supporting Stepfamilies
The first way of supporting stepfamilies is realizing they are complex. The more parties are involved, the more complex. But […]

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“I’m Committed That We’re Not Going to Divorce”
I’ve heard this and similar statements frequently—most often from adults with divorced parents. However, while the spouse in counseling with […]

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Two Secrets for a Lasting Marriage
It’s no secret that adults with divorced parents have trouble staying married. Many succeed. Many don’t. But past president Jimmy […]

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Did you Find the Right Mother’s Day/Father’s Day Card?
Every year 100+ million Mother’s Day cards are sent—72 million for Fathers. For many, it’s a fun and sentimental task. […]

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Helping Teens Navigate Parental Divorce
I’m often asked for tools to help someone’s teens deal with their divorce. I just stumbled across a solid resource […]

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The Life-Giving Wounds Ministry
Life-Giving Wounds is a ministry that provides workshops, weekend retreats, ACD support groups, and other resources for adults with divorced […]

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Visitation Ended but the Loss Continued
Suddenly, I was at the top of the stairs watching my father leave. That scene repeated every time my father […]

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Is Happy the Standard for Marriage?
In my world of divorce research a lot of celebrity articles come up….which I ignore. On rare occasion I’ll address […]

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Overcoming the Disappointment Gap
The disappointment gap is the distance between our expectation and reality. For example, Covid invaded our home 2 days before […]

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Three Steps for ACD to Stop Hating Christmas
It’s the most wonderful time……of the year…….. Is it? Mom insists that you have Christmas dinner in the afternoon—which just […]

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What do Husbands Want?
In my last blog I noted that one of the challenges husbands with divorced parents experience in marriage is separating […]

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What do Wives Want?
Sigmund Freud, the father of modern psychology, lamented, “The great question that has never been answered, and which I have […]

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Reflections on my Dad’s Funeral
My father’s memorial service has passed. It was a wonderful time of honoring him and God. He was a Christian, […]

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When Divorced Parents Die — Questions
Ten years ago my mother passed. Five years ago my first stepmother passed. Weeks ago my father passed. Due to […]

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Are We as Obedient as the Demons? – A Sunday Snippet
I’m reading “A Year with Jesus”1 which includes daily reflections on Jesus’ words, life, and impact. The author reviewed Matthew […]

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Gates Puts Gray Divorce Back in the Spotlight
If you haven’t heard, Bill and Melinda Gates are divorcing after 27 years (34 as a couple1). Not familiar with […]

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Celebrating our 25th Podcast!
Our 25th podcast is uploaded! This program dealt with helping adults with divorced parents move from being hope-less to hope-full. […]

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The Peace of a Million Dollars vs. A Peace-Filled Holiday
You find out that one million dollars is deposited into your account. What would you do? Pay off your debts? […]

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“Home Will Never Be the Same Again”—A Gray Divorce Book Review
“There is no ‘them’ anymore.” Heartfelt words spoken by a man whose parents divorced after he’d become an adult. Gray […]

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Choose a Better Path Promo Video Cast
One year ago we filmed the promo video for my book, Choose a Better Path: Overcoming the Impact of Your […]

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Second Highest Season for Divorce is Here
January is #1 for inquiries and filings, but according to a University of Washington study, August is second.* With Covid, […]

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The GIFT in Anger
Unresolved anger is often tops the lists of issues that affect adults with divorced parents. While anger is rarely considered […]

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The Loyalty Challenge: Who Do You Love More?
The good news is a growing number of articles and resources are helping parents divorce in ways that minimize the […]

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Forgiveness: Scooping up the Poop
Dog walkers in my area carry bags for the poop. Basically, they’re picking up someone’s mess. Granted, there’s some involuntariness […]

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Father Hunger and the Search for Manhood
“Father hunger is a deep, persistent desire for emotional connection with the father that is experienced by all children.” I […]
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Divorce: A Preventable Pandemic?
If you haven’t heard, divorce is “soaring” in China and Covid is the reported culprit. Most news stories are sourcing […]
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New Podcast Series on ACD Issues
A ten-part series of programs that give an overview of common issues that impact adults with divorced parents are now […]
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Rodeos, Anger, and Adult Children of Divorce
I’ve attended my first rodeo! For you urbanites and millennials, a rodeo is like an old country fair on steroids. […]
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Time for a Seasonal Reboot
One day my phone decided to stay in an update loop. Tech support made valiant efforts to un-loop it, but […]

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Gray Divorce and the First Holidays
There are many firsts in life—some good, some forgettable, some not so good. If parental divorce barges through our door […]
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Loving Your “Enemies” A Sunday Snippet
Jesus stunned His audience by saying, “You have heard it said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ […]
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Primal Loss Through the Eyes of ACD
If you could ask adult children of divorce questions about the impact of their parents’ divorce, what would you ask? […]
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Father Hunger, Premarital Sex, and Divorce Pt. 1
To set the stage for this important topic please answer the following questions: Question #1: Based on the number of sexual […]
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Nuzzling in God’s Neck – A Sunday Snippet
Nuzzling in God’s Neck – A Sunday Snippet Maybe you had one of those conversations with your mom, dad, or stepparent. […]
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Easter, Anger, and Adult Children of Divorce
Though the peeps and bunnies are gone, I keep thinking about a movie I saw Easter Sunday. Normally Charlton Heston […]
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Closet Prodigals Who Ran Away From Home
For kids, parental divorce often creates a desire to escape from it. Our brains think, As soon as I’m old […]
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The Many Faces of Anger (Part 1)
Years ago, a public service announcement on television warned that high blood pressure was “the silent killer.” For adult children […]
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The Cross and Feelings of Unworthiness
Three days have passed since the world celebrated Easter. The eggs and chocolate may be gone, but the cross continues […]